Day 1

Today is the first real day of my adult life and I have so many emotions and feelings running through my head that it's physically hard to breathe.

This is the first time in my life I have felt a true anxiety about everything in my life. I'm living in a house filled with strangers, in a room I don't feel welcome in. I want to spend approximately 0 time in this house. I'm not working and I have too much free time. I am, in a sense, floating.

But a wise person can see the positives permeating through the negative.

This house is right down the street from UCB so now I have no excuse not to go all the time. And by right down the street, I mean so close I can walk.

This house being unwelcoming will make me want to be outside of it more often, seeing people, sights, and seeking work. Being outside of my comfort zone is anxiety ridden, but will allow me to grow as a person. I want to start working out more, running, creating, writing, living.

This is the fresh start I needed. I will use my anxiety towards making a better me. I'll be calling upon all of you for help and positive reinforcement, but let's fucking do this shit.

Or...I'll probably just jerk off instead.