Adrian's first flight: the terminal

I walk into the terminal. There's a bunch of self-checking machines. But based on that chappelles show sketch where lil Jon goes to the airport, I know I want to get in a line at a counter of some sort and get my ticket from a human. I walk down a hallway to where there appears to be a counter. It's roped off to organize the line. But nobody is in line, and I soon discover there's no hole in the rope. So this whole area is just roped off and inaccessible. Dumb.
I go back to the self machines. A short Japanese woman is staring at the Japanese symbols on the screen hopelessly. She has no idea whats going on. She turns back to me for help. That makes me laugh, and she walks away flustered and confused. I step to the screen and gaze for a moment at the Japanese shit covering it. There's a button in the corner that says "English" and I press it.
I pay for my bag and discover they print my boarding pass too. Sweet. Now I got my ticket, so what do I do with my bag? Dont see anyone to ask so I go down the hallway again. There's a lady down there who tells me to "go to 1."
Ok, 1 it is. I go back to the machines. Theyre clustered together and numbered, with the numbers starting at 2. I look around some more; down at the other end there's a TSA baggage place labeled "area 1." Is this the 1?
I follow a couple people over. The TSA people are like, "yo dawg, you gotta get a label thingy and check it over there." they point to the machines. Back to the machines. I find an unoccupied worker and they check my bag and tell me to just leave it next to some cart. I put it there and stand watching it. Am I supposed to just turn and walk away right now? I stare at my bag until its taken by a worker and tossed onto a conveyor belt. Like luke watching Obi wan go off on his own in the death star, I accept that my checked bag and I now each have our own mission. Hopefully we will meet again.
So I checked my bag. Cool. Feels like I just beat a level in a video game. I'm not totally sure what the next level is, so I decide it's a good time to take a piss.
I walk out of the bathroom and follow some dude who looks like he knows what he's doing to an escalator, and eventually find myself in line for security. Sweet, found the next level. Scott and Jesse adequately prepared me for this stage and I pass through like a seasoned veteran.
Now I'm just sitting and waiting. My plane leaves in 2 hours, hopefully nothing too eventful will happen between now and then.

Adrian out.